Beef Vindaloo

Diners in Britain have slammed a new report that says that Indian takeaway food is fatty and unhealthy. The report, carried out by Which? magazine, called Indian, Chinese and pizza takeaway food grossly unhealthy and unadvisable for daily consumption. It said that one Indian or Chinese meal had more calories than an average person should consume in an entire day. But what surprised the magazine was that people felt that given a choice between putting on a little eating good food s opposed to staying fit and trim and consume British food, the choice was simple - they’d rather have the fatty food.

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Against the background of the never-ending debate of sex education in schools and the moral police’s objection against the Washington Redskins cheerleaders, senior officials in the Indian government are under pressure to redefine the rules concerning the role of sex in Indian culture. Given the fact that senior Indian politicians have lived through all 60-plus years of India as a country, it puts them in a unique position to gauge the sentiments of both pre-independence and post-independence India. There is considerable debate to redefine what some consider archaic sentiments and some sort of decision should be reached by the final of the IPL.

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Do Indian processions cause damage rather than celebrate a happy occasion? A recent study conducted by the University of Michigan suggests a direct link between processions and brain cell damage. The report suggests various factors for this but declares that essentially, it is the overall “pointlessness” of any processions that is the root cause. According to the report, one Indian procession happens somewhere in the country every two minutes. That’s a staggering 15 million processions a year. The report says that by the end of the decade alone, more than 10 million Indians would be completely retarded.

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While the government in the Indian state of Goa pushes its police force hard to ensure the safety of women visitors in the state, thousands of Indian tourists are reported to have cancelled their holidays because of this heightened security. These tourists, who had planned to celebrate the Hindu festival of Holi in Goa, are now backing out. Their reason, Goa Police are under orders to arrest men found harassing or assaulting women. Seeing these arrests as a dampener on their Holi plans, these travellers are looking elsewhere to celebrate this Indian festival.

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The push for action against cruelty towards animals looks to take a dark turn as reports come in about several thousand protests being planned around the world to boycott Easter Sunday. Vegetarians around the globe are looking to highlight the problems of glorifying meat eating by staging demonstrations in front of several churches in major cities worldwide. Unconfirmed reports put the number of cities at least 35 including Moscow, New York, London, Barcelona, Cartagena, Mumbai, Sydney and Singapore. Protestors want a fundamental change in the way Easter is celebrated, namely removing the egg eating from the celebrations.

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After years of facing criticism over their ambition and apparent love of career and money over religion, working 20-something year olds have come out en masse in support of the religious festivals being celebrated back to back. The upcoming extended weekend that places the Catholic festival of Good Friday, the Hindu festival of Holi and the Catholic festival of Easter on successive days is been recognised by these working professionals as essential for them to appreciate the finer nuances of Indian culture. These professionals, all in their 20s and early 30s believe that government should order more mutli-religious holidays to occur one after another.

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The Indian Supreme Court’s decision to dismiss all cases against Hollywood actor Richard Gere has the potential to become an immense learning experience for all foreigners entering the country. Gere was threatened with legal action after he kissed Bollywood actor Shilpa Shetty in public. Foreigners will now be taught to use the garlands presented to them on arrival as a cover if they want to indulge in public displays of affection, a precedent set by Bollywood films.

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