Beef Vindaloo

Tired of the seemingly never-ending Harbhajan Singh-related controversies, Australian cricket’s governing body Cricket Australia is looking to once and for settle the issue. Aware that legal threats and complaints to the ICC barely causes a dent in the BCCI armour, Cricket Australia is resorting to using their trump card. Namely, if the Board for Control of Cricket in India does not listen to them and continues troubling them, they will tell their mommies and then BCCI will be in a lot of trouble.

CA’s Chief Executive James Sutherland does not see anything wrong with these tactics. “We told them nicely that they have to have to have to listen to us but they are cheaters and cheaters never ever EVER prosper,” he said, “and if they continue to be liars then we will tell mommy and then let’s see what they do.” The International Cricket Council is urging CA not to take such dire action asking them to withdraw their complaints in the spirit of the game. But considering the battering their ego has taken over the last summer, nothing looks to stop them. “The BCCI are cheaters – cheater cheater pumpkin eater,” Sutherland said before adding, “liar, liar – pants on fire.”

The BCCI meanwhile has not officially responded to the issue but given their new penchant of fighting fire with fire, the unofficial response seems to be only the first attack. “I am pretty sure that our mommy can beat their mommy so why should we worry,” said Sharad Pawar, head of the BCCI, “and wait till their mommy goes home then we’ll see who gets to play with us ever again.” In the middle of this on-going battle are the Australian players, Matthew Hayden and Andrew Symonds. The latter believes that all of this is the BCCI’s fault. “I told them that this would happen but they didn’t listen to me,” he said, “see, see, see… I told you so. Happy?”

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